#favouritemodel No. 18 – House of Change – Denial

When I find myself in the “room of contentment” and hear about an impending change for the first time, it is usually a short walk to the next room, the “room of denial”.

An inner attitude of “against change” dominates in this space; people who find themselves here have generally not accepted the necessity or the sense of the impending change or have clear doubts about it. With the positive emotions of the past in the “space of satisfaction”, an attitude ranging from self-confidence to arrogance to ignorance still dominates here too. From people in the space of denial, for example, you hear attitudes such as:

“Not another change!”
“The management simply doesn’t understand our business.”
“The next pig to be driven through the village.”

The emotional state of anger, despair and rejection often manifests itself in actions such as: a sometimes aggressive defense of the past and present; ignoring information that comes from outside; glossing over facts and figures or emphasizing past successes.

How does this #favoritemodel help you?

In order to support your employees on their way through the “space of denial” to the next space, it makes sense to enable a fundamental acceptance of the change. Denial and resistance are natural and normal reactions to change at this point. It is important that you allow and value these forms of emotionality in your team. If you perceive resistance, you know that those affected are beginning to come to terms with the change. It is more critical if there is no resistance at all.

If everyone involved is aware of this normality, it will be easier to deal with these emotions in the future and then move on to the next room, the room of confusion.

From a systemic perspective, overcoming denial and resistance cannot be controlled from the outside. As a manager, it is therefore your task in this phase to support the individual decision-making process.

You can encourage this, for example, by adopting a coaching approach in which you ask questions such as “How will this change benefit you personally?” and give employees time to develop their own answers. It is also important to strike a balance between respecting the past and sending a clear message that change is necessary and will come. Clearly emphasize the scope for co-design for the team and involve those affected in shaping the specific change. The more scope employees have to shape the change, the more likely they are to move into the next space, the “space of confusion”, in which acceptance of the change dominates and employees have a clear “yes” to the change.

At the same time, as a manager, you are also part of the change. It is therefore important to give yourself the same space for emotions as your colleagues. In the best case scenario, you are already advanced in the process, but this does not have to be the case. As much as your employees need you to provide clear direction in the “space of denial”, you may also need it yourself. It is therefore recommended that you discuss your personal emotions and doubts with your manager. It is important to be authentic as a manager, but at the same time it is not very helpful in the “space of denial” if you join forces with your team to form a “resistance group”, but have the attitude and capacity to lead yourself and be available to your employees as a source of answers.

Author

Katrin Aust
Consultant